Texts from Drug Dealers


Some texts from drug dealers are about as subtle as Trump’s tweets on immigration.

Others, as we can see from the Instagram @shotta_texts_ldn, are so clever it’s almost as if Shakespeare himself wrote them. If Shakespeare had a fondness for Colombia and used literary devices such as ‘Charlie cleaner than Singapore,’ and ‘Bags as fat as my girl’s ass.’

“Call me Mr. Burns cos I’m the one with that power plant.”

After hearing friends laughing about a text from one of their dealers at a party in London (kidding, no one touches the stuff there), art director Georgi Georgiev realised that there was more than just “…a side of white rice or a side of green peas,” coming through the text line.

Working in advertising for years, Georgiev could spot A grade wordplay from a mile away. So he made the website Class A Marketing. While it probably took a whole advertising department a few months and a six figure paycheck to come up with such marketing gold as, ‘I’m lovin’ it,’ maybe they could have cut out the middle man and gone straight to your local dealer.

“I’m not selling anymore as I’ve graduated now and don’t want to go to prison. Thanks for partially funding my degree and offering me a modicum of support. Please delete my number. Thanks.”

Georgiev pairs real texts from drug dealers, with the marketing techniques he thinks they have used. He doesn’t want to glorify drugs, just draw attention to a taboo industry in a funny way and make money for charity while he’s at it, by selling t-shirts with his designs on them. All $$ made goes to a drug and alcohol support charity.

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