Rage Against the Supergroup

‘Prophets of Rage’ current homepage graphic

Speculation is mounting over a Rage Against the Machine ‘Supergroup’, minus Zach de la Rocha.

There are many things wrong with the world we are currently living in. We are headed for inevitable abomination due to global warming, we are engaged in a devastating war in the Middle East, and we are facing one of the largest refugee crises in history. There’s also the possibility of Donald Shrimpdick swearing his tiny palms into the oval office, and last time I checked, the youngest Kardashian still had working lungs. Injustice is everywhere. But what trumps it all is the popularity of the Supergroup, when aging has-beens from bands of Christmas past join together to tickle their crumbling molars with ancient tongues for a lingering taste of their former glory. There have been some real shockers in the past, but the most recent rumor is by far the worst example in all of the supergroup’s sad and persistent history. There is talk of a Rage Against the Machine ‘supergroup’, made up of members Tom Morello, Tim Commerford and Brad Wilk, Public Enemy’s Chuck D, and Cypress Hill’s B-Real. It is rumored they will call themselves ‘Prophets of Rage’, and it is confirmed they will be fucking horrendous.

Rage without Zach de la Rocha! Is this some kind of joke? There is no Rage without de la Rocha. Period. You think Chuck D and B-Real can deliver an ‘UGH!’ with the same fury he did? What is wrong with you? Why do you have working lungs?

Here’s where it gets considerably worse. I know you already felt like you were gaining steam on a steep decline, but now I am opening the trapdoor that will deliver you to the devil. A video is circulating of Jacoby Shaddix of Papa Roach joining Disturbed on stage to cover ‘Killing In the Name’ over the weekend, now fueling speculation that perhaps they too will be part of the shameless money grab ‘Supergroup’.

Which reminds me of another thing, are people fucking kidding about how good Disturbed’s cover of ‘Sound of Silence’ is? Because it sounds like Chad Kruger impersonating the bald guy from Live impersonating the now incarcerated lead singer of Creed. If you google the song, Disturbed’s version comes up in the results before Simon & Garfunkel’s, and it has 55 million views. Hello darkness, my old friend.

When news spread about the website prophetsofrage.com sporting a mysterious countdown ticking in the middle of the page, I got excited. I thought RATM were reforming to storm the streets of California before their presidential primary election in response to Trump’s election as the Republican candidate, after first joking about his presidential run in their video for “Sleep Now in the Fire” almost 16 years ago. Not only was I wrong, but now I’m dead, burning in a hell that plays Disturbed while I beg for the sound of silence.


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